Fruit of the Spirit - Self-Control

Of all the characteristics of the Fruit of the Spirit that we’ve talked about, growing up, this morning’s is the one that I absolutely mastered; self-control. Actually, it was just the opposite. I had very little restraint. If there was any sort of adrenaline rush, any potential to entertain, the dangers of whatever it was didn’t even cross my mind. The amount of roofs I jumped off of onto trampolines and into pools, the time I scaled a 60 foot cliff with no gear, jumping off the stage and over the orchestra pit to nearly shatter my kneecap, countless emergency room visits…if you knew me in high school and early college, you would have seen that self-control was not something that I ever excelled at. 

Self-control. This is perhaps the most difficult to master, because it can be the smallest thing, like saying no to that 7th oreo that is staring at me from the package, or it can be a bigger issue that can determine our sobriety or sexual purity. It is something that everyone in the world struggles with to some extent.

There is a famous study that was done in the 1960s, and many believe that it revealed the “most important characteristic for success in health, work and life.” The study took hundreds of children, most between the ages of 4 and 5, individually into a room with a table. Once in the room, the researcher put one marshmallow in front of the child on the table, and told them that they were going to leave for 15 minutes. If the child did not eat the marshmallow, they would get a 2nd one at the end of the time, but if they did eat it, they would not. Super simple; one now or 2 later.

Here’s the really interesting thing. The researchers continued their study on these particular children for over 40 years, and here’s what they found: 

“The children who were willing to delay gratification and waited to receive the second marshmallow ended up having higher SAT scores, lower levels of substance abuse, lower likelihood of obesity, better responses to stress, better social skills as reported by their parents, and generally better scores in a range of other life measures.” So there is something very powerful about having self-control. And while this is a common issue in our world today, there is only one way to truly see victory over our destructive impulses, and that is by dying to ourselves and giving control over to the Lord. 

This particular term has some overlap in our modern definitions when compared to the Greek word found in Galatians. Our English definition is “restraint exercised over one's own impulses, emotions, or desires.” This is an expanded definition from the original Greek word, “enkrateia (en-krah-taia),” which simply means “inner power.” And while the world is left trying to master the art of self-control, we, as followers of Jesus, have been given this strength, not to master it, for none of us will in this life, but to fight intensely the battle against the longings of our flesh.

This is a battle we will fight our entire lives. John Piper said that “the very concept of self-control implies a battle between a divided self. Daily our “self” produces desires that should be ‘denied’ or ‘controlled.’ And like any of our muscles that we have to work out to avoid atrophy, we’ll see from the apostle Paul that self-control must be thought about in the same way. 

Let’s go ahead and place a definition on it for the sake of clarity as we continue forward this morning. “Self-Control is the exercise of inner strength under the direction of sound judgment that enables us to do, think, and say the things that are pleasing to God.” On the flip-side of that, then, would be a lack of self-control which causes us to follow through on those sinful desires that are not pleasing to God.

A Biblical Comparison 

I want to spend a few minutes comparing two stories in Scripture in which Satan uses natural human desires to tempt different individuals. Each story has a different outcome because on a different ability of self-control. Let’s start in Genesis chapter 2. Read Genesis 2:15-17. So here is the command. “You can eat from every tree in the garden, except this tree that will give you knowledge of good and evil. If you do that, you will die.” Here’s the standard of living. Eat this, don’t eat this. 

Turn over 1 chapter to Genesis chapter 3. Read Genesis 3:1. This is where it always begins. This is where temptation always begins. Did God really say? Is it really that bad? Will you really be punished? Will just one more bite really hurt you? Will just one small glance really be so bad? And what Satan does here with Eve is twist the words of God. Did God really say not to eat of any tree? Immediately Eve’s knowledge of the standard of God is challenged. 

Read Genesis 3:2-5. Way to go Eve! “No! God didn’t say that. He did say though that we can’t eat of this one specific tree, or we would die.” But Satan had already started to sow seeds of doubt. And this is where he really ramps up his attack. “That’s not going to happen! Come on, you really think if you eat this fruit you’re going to die? One little bite won’t kill you! In fact, this will be a good thing for you! You’ll feel empowered, enlightened, you’ll be like God!”

In this moment, Eve has a crucial decision to make. Does she have enough self-control to say no? To stand on the truth that God laid out for her good? Or, would she fall into the trap of self-gratification, self-fulfillment. Will the temporary pleasure of eating this delicious fruit outweigh the long-term consequences? Of course we know how this story ends, and Eve does not have enough self-control to say no to her own desires, and she eats the fruit, and gives it to Adam, and in that moment sin enters the world, and everything is cursed, leaving creation longing to be put back together, longing for its redemption.

Now, turn over to Matthew chapter 4. We have a completely different response here from Jesus. Now, let’s just go ahead and preface this with the fact that Jesus is God, that He is perfect, so His response reflects His nature. But, the truth of this is that Jesus, in His humanity, faced temptation. And we need to dig in just a little bit. Three different aspects of His humanity were tempted. 

Read Matthew 4:1-11

1. Lust of the Flesh (Physical Needs and Desires)

Jesus fasted for 40 days and 40 nights. Matthew tells us that He was hungry. In His humanity, He desired food. Satan took the opportunity in this moment to offer Jesus something. He offered Him temporary fulfillment. He offered Him something that would satisfy His immediate desire. Jesus’ response is where we see the temptation a little more clearly. “Man shall not live by bread alone, but every word of God.” In other words, God will provide everything I need in this life, and it isn’t up to me to usurp His providence. We can read out of this temptation of Jesus anything in our lives that we desire that would fulfill a physical need or desire. Now, would it have been wrong for Jesus to eat? No. But it would have been wrong for Him to take matters into His own hands instead of trusting in the providence of God. 

2. Pride of Life (God’s Protection and Intervention)

We also see Satan tempt Jesus to put God to the test, and the way that he does this is by twisting the words of Scripture, just like he did with Eve. He misuses Psalm 91 to try and get Jesus to believe that He could take unnecessary risks with His life, and that no matter what, God would protect Him. “You have heard that it was said, but did God really say? Is that really what God meant?” The temptation then would be to test the dependability of God, rather than relying on faith in our obedience to Him.

3. Lust of the Eyes (Worldly Power and Success)

Finally, Satan dangles power and success in front of Jesus. “Just bow down to me, worship me instead of God, give up your soul, and all the power will be given to you.” The temptation to forsake allegiance to the Lord to be successful in the eyes of the world. And again, Jesus, in His response reveals the true nature of this temptation. “You shall worship the Lord God, and Him alone.” “You shall have no other gods before me.” Commandment number 1. So what’s the point of digging into all of this. The point is that Jesus exercised incredible self-control at the temptation to forsake the things of God. He showed perfect self-control in the face of something appealing and life-changing. 

So we have this contrast. The temptation was the same. Did God really say? Would it really be so bad? Don’t you want more out of life? Don’t you want pleasure in this life? Eve, in her humanity, fell for the trap. Jesus, in His humanity was tempted, but in His divinity had the self-control to keep His eyes fixed on truth. Now remember, we are talking about a gift of the Holy Spirit that indwells us. That same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead lives in us. That same power that resides in Jesus to withstand temptation lives in us. That same power that gave Jesus control over His desires, His emotions, His actions, lives in us. 

Application

Now, as we turn our attention to our own lives, what we quickly find out is that self-control in Scripture is incredibly important. I mean just listen to the seriousness of self-control from the mouth of Jesus in Matthew, “If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.” This is really intense from the lips of Jesus. There is a battle waging, one that requires extreme measures to eradicate that which causes us to sin out of our lives. 

Paul continues this thought in 1 Corinthians 9:25-27: “Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” The Greek word for exercise is “agonizomenos” which is where we get our word agonize from. Is exercise easy? When we push ourselves, it is agonizing. It hurts! Paul says that athletes agonize self-control. They push and fight to discipline their bodies. In the same way, as Christians, we agonize self-control. We fight to discipline our minds, to discipline our eyes, our ears, our hearts. And we can talk more about this, but let’s just make sure we understand something. This is not anything that we can do of our own power. It’s only because of the power of the Holy Spirit in us. It’s also because of the power of Jesus. Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians 5 that “the love of Christ controls us.” So it’s not just a matter of fighting for control in our lives, it’s fighting to release control and instead be steered by the love of Jesus, by the power of Jesus, by the gospel of Jesus. 

So what do we do in the moment? When we are at that critical point of decision, what do we do? Here’s where I think we start. Jesus, in the Garden of Gethsemane shortly before He is arrested, is wrestling. He is wrestling with what lies before Him. He is tempted to find a way out. In fact, He asks God to provide another way. But then, in this moment, we see Jesus release His human desire for relief from what’s to come, into the hands of His Father. And how does He do it? He prays. “Not my will, but your will be done.” It’s so simple.

We start there. In that moment of decision, we give it to the Lord. “God, I’m really feeling the battle waging in my heart right now. I know what will honor you, but I feel weak in my humanity. I fear that I’m going to do what I know I should not do, so I’m giving this moment to you. Not my will, but yours be done.” In other words, “God show me what would glorify you in this moment, and use your Spirit to empower me there.” 

We have been gifted, by the Holy Spirit, to magnify Christ through how we love, how we choose joy in difficulty, how we let peace rule in anxious times, how we exercise patience in high-intensity moments, how we show kindness to those that may not deserve it, how our lives are marked by moral goodness, how we remain faithful in a shifting culture, how we respond in gentleness, and how we express self-control when others wrong us. And ALL of these are evidenced in the life of the Christian.