Mark 10:1-12
In our passage this morning, Jesus deals with a very difficult issue. It’s one that we need to tread carefully upon, with sensitivity and caution, while finding our truth in God’s Words. The Pharisees approach Jesus and try to trap Him with a question about divorce.
If you look at studies on divorce rates in America, you will find that in 1920, less than 1% of the population was divorced. 2011 15%, and according to the American Psychological Association, in 2019 37% of marriages ended in divorce. Those numbers fluctuate depending on which study you read, but what we see is a steep increase in divorce rates over time. The gospel of our culture is a “self-fulfilling, whatever makes you happy gospel.” The sanctity of the institution of marriage as God has ordained it has been dismantled and turned into nothing more than a temporary feel good relationship that “I can just get out of because I’m no longer happy.” It’s a major epidemic in our country today.
If I were to ask how many of us in this room have been affected by divorce in some capacity in our families, I presume that most of the hands would go up. This is not a fun topic to talk about. But if we are going to talk about it, then we have to make sure that we get it right.
I want to make sure right up front that we make it clear that if you have experienced divorce in your life, it does not make you any less valuable to God than someone who has not. I also want to say that I recognize that talking about it this morning might open some wounds or bring up some anger or resentment, and so before we get into our passage I want us to pray.
Pray
Read Mark 10:1-2
Jesus and His disciples leave Capernaum, in the region of Galilee, for the last time. His ministry in Galilee has come to an end, and He now enters Judea to the south, and then crosses the Jordan to the East. As we might expect, the crowds gather around Him, and He begins to teach. In the midst of His teaching the Pharisees approach Him and Scripture says their purpose was to trap Him. How could they be setting a snare with this question? We have to look at the historical context in 2 different ways to get our answer:
1.. There had arisen a great debate amidst the school of the Pharisees. In Deuteronomy 24, which Jesus references in the next verse, there’s a teaching on divorce. The debate revolved around the first verse of Deuteronomy 24: “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce…” Specifically, 2 interpretations of “some indecency” or “any indecency” had arisen.
Rabbi Shammai - more conservative school of thought, taught that the only grounds for divorce was adultery, or sexual immorality.
Rabbi Hillel - more liberal school of thought, taught that divorce could be granted for “any” indecency. Most Pharisees agreed with Rabbi Hillel, and took a more liberal approach to Deuteronomy 24. They went so far, in fact, that historical records tell us “any” indecency included anything that the wife did to displease her husband. This included, “burning his dinner, allowing someone else to see her ankles, letting her hair down, making a negative comment about her mother-in-law, or, if she avoided all of that, the husband was even permitted to divorce her if he found someone else that he liked better.”
Matthew in his gospel confirms this part of the trap in his account by adding to the Pharisees question, “is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for ANY cause?”
2.. If you remember the tragic ending of John the Baptist, he had called out Herod Antipas for his unlawful divorce and remarriage to his brother’s wife, and this ultimately led to his death. Herod Antipas was the ruler of Galilee and Perea, which was an Eastern region across the Jordan river from Judea. In verse 1 of our passage this morning, Mark tells us that Jesus went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan. Jesus was in Perea. Jesus was in the region ruled by Herod Antipas, the same Herod that had John the Baptist killed for calling out his unlawful divorce.
Knowing all of this, we reread verse 2, “and the Pharisees came up in order to test Him.” They want to see which school of thought He will agree with. If He agrees with Rabbi Shammai, that divorce is only allowed because of adultery, then He would be condemning Herod just like John did. The Pharisees might have hoped to bring this news to Herod to put an end to Jesus once and for all.
But, if Jesus agreed with Rabbi Hillel, that a man could divorce his wife because of “any” indecency, then He would give justification to the twisting of the Torah, and be found siding with popular opinion rather than truth.
Read vs. 3-4
As Jesus typically does, He answers their question with a question. “Well, what does Moses tell you in the Law?” And what they do has a very interesting application for us even this morning, because they take just one small piece of the passage in Deuteronomy to use as justification for their belief, but they forsake the passage surrounding it. They take a small piece of a passage to justify what they FEEL, and ignore the truth that surrounds it.
Read Deuteronomy 24:1-4
See the passage isn’t really about the rules of divorce as much as it is about the certificate of divorce that must be produced to make it official. The Pharisees took verse 2, that the man is allowed to write a certificate of divorce, and coupled that with a misinterpretation of the word “indecency,” and very quickly the allowance for divorce became very broad. The word “indecency” in the original Hebrew is translated “nakedness” or “uncleanness.” It’s a lot more specific than burning dinner or insulting your mother-in-law.
But what Jesus does next is so good. He has no interest in debating the grounds for divorce, but instead redirects the conversation and takes their minds back to the very beginning.
Read vs. 5-9
God, through the Law of Moses, permitted divorce because of the hardness of the hearts of Israel. But it was not a reflection on God’s design for marriage. Kent Hughes, in his commentary on Mark, explains it this way: “Jesus' answer corrects the Pharisees, for Moses only permitted divorce. He didn't command it, as the Pharisees asserted. What Moses did command was the granting of a divorce certificate for the woman's protection. Without a certificate she would be subject to exploitation and even recrimination. The reason God allowed divorce was that the hearts of the men of Israel were hard. This was a divine concession to human weakness, but it cannot be taken as approval.”
“But,” Jesus says in verse 6. This reminds me of the Sermon on the Mount, when Jesus says multiple times, “you have heard that it was said, BUT…” You have heard what Moses said, BUT, that is not what God intended when He designed the marriage relationship. What did God intend? What was the original design?
1.. God intended marriage to be between a man and a woman (6)
From the very beginning, God in His sovereignty and perfection created 2 people. One male, and one female. He created them uniquely different for a lot of reasons, but one of them was to join together in marriage, the closest picture we have of the relationship between Jesus and His church.
As Jesus talks in these verses about marriage, it is between a man and his wife. In all of Scripture, when Jesus talks about marriage, it is in terms of a man and his wife. When any of the apostles write their letters to different churches, marriage is always talked about in terms of a man and his wife. Nowhere do we see a redefining of marriage. Nowhere do we see any exceptions. In the beginning, God created them male and female. “Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife.”
2.. God intended marriage to be permanent (7-9)
This is where we get the idea of “leave and cleave.” There must be separation from father and mother in a healthy way, and a joining together with one’s spouse. The word “join” here would be the same as “glue.” But not the kind of glue that you can easily pull apart. It’s the kind of glue that creates a permanent bond. The connection is so tight that it is impossible to separate. The connection is such that you can’t even tell where one thing ends and the other begins. It’s almost as if it is now 1 object. This is marriage. This is only possible by a supernatural bond. It is only possible because of the work of the Holy Spirit. God has joined us together in marriage, He has fused us into one object, so much so that on a spiritual level you can’t tell where the husband ends and the wife begins. The 2 become 1 flesh.
And this is revolutionary to the disciples. They get into a private setting and they are like, “Jesus! We need some more explanation on this. This is all new to us, take us deeper.”
Read vs. 10-12
Before we finish our passage, we have to look at what Matthew says in his account of this story. Mark omits a pretty important phrase from Jesus, and we’re not exactly sure why. There is a figure of speech that Matthew records called the exception clause: “And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
So what Jesus is saying is listen, the only permissible grounds for divorce is sexual immorality. If someone leaves the marriage for any other reason, and gets remarried, then that person has committed adultery. In other words, the bond, the union, the becoming one flesh is unbreakable, except for sexual immorality. God is the One who created the union, so you don’t just get to decide that you want out. That’s not how He designed it to be. And the only reason there was an exception in the first place was because of the weakness of the Israelites, and God allowing a way out to protect the one who was wronged. But that wasn’t the original design of marriage! But, like all other areas of brokenness, the curse of sin has touched the institution of marriage, and one of the horrible effects to come out of it is divorce.
Application
A.. God hates divorce
Malachi 2:16 - God says it, “I hate divorce, says the Lord the God of Israel.”
It goes in complete opposition to His original design. It breaks a union that He himself put together. It hurts and wounds people like concentric circles, sometimes for generations. It creates hate, resentment, anger, revenge. It causes confusion, doubt, and dishonor. But even though God hates it…
B.. God permits divorce
This is never the first option. Even when there is infidelity, if the person who committed the wrong is truly repentant and wants to work on the marriage, then I believe that’s what honors God. However, when attempts have been made at reconciliation, and the guilty party doesn’t show remorse, or even a desire to work on the marriage, then biblically there is an allowance for divorce.
We also see in 1 Corinthians 7 from Paul, that if a Christian is married to a non-Christian, and the non-Christian deserts the Christian spouse, then the Christian spouse is biblically permitted to divorce the unbelieving spouse.
And while God hates divorce, but still permits divorce, there is good news in all of this.
C. Gospel
The good news is that no matter what we do in this life, and no matter what someone else might do to us, we have a Savior named Jesus who loves us unconditionally. That means He loves us no matter what. And while there is brokenness in marriages across the world, justifying ending things based on emotions and feelings, falling “out of love,” we know that in Christ there is nothing that can separate us.
Romans 8:38-39 - For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
